play a melody that everyone knows.

Thursday, March 30, 2006

hello all. good morning!

i've been dragged to mac @ jp to watch my colleagues eat breakfast.

haha not really dragged. i volunteered to come anyway.

i'm so so so lack of sleep nowadays. totally exhausted. standing whole day long. boo.

ohohoh, anyone going to hollerback crew's semi-finals and finals? call me along call me along!

*yawn*

aight. i'm gone.

le noir;
7:32 AM

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

imagine u gotta stand for whole 9 hours, cutting and pasting and photocopying documents, and the whole cycle keep repeating for uncountable times, i bet many of you will "i'll quit".

i went back to the company happily, thinking i'll be sitting in front of computer, typing and typing. i was so wrong.

i did what i said at the beginning.

the first wasnt that tiring. second day, which is today, was super tiring. to think that badbrain wasn't around to crap with me like what she did yesterday, it was really bad.

ohohoh, there're two more new comers. yaya maybe coming back. she better. haha. i still want my teh tarik buddy!

i just realised the company gang got bigger.

i can't wait for next week to come. cos i will get to meet fernie fern fern in person, my lappie lap lap and many many friends! ohohoh, i really cannot wait.

le noir;
7:02 PM

Sunday, March 26, 2006

woo. i prefer the com in my bros' room to mine. and i like it when i blog here. just that any moment, some curious heads will pop up from behind.

oh i kind of got my lappie already. brrr. i thought it'd be like cash and carry sort of thing. but i gotta wait for around 2 more weeks before i can get it. and i must go down to cineleisure to get it. what a fuss.

hmm to anyone who's keen about my current health, i'm feeling lot more better than on friday. thank u all.

oh i've baked my muffins today. hahaha it's weird. u see, i was supposed to bake muffins right? they turned out to be butter cakes with raisins. pretty weird. i shall try it all again soon.

i'm all out of love.
i'm so lost without you.
i know you were right,
believing for so long.

i love the song. one of my all time favourites. i love oldie lovie songies.

ohohoh.... shower me with your loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....

i want to shop shop shop !!!

le noir;
7:29 PM

Saturday, March 25, 2006

for the whole of yesterday, i felt like puking. i wanted to stay at home, but i got to accompany badbrain to school to return the remaining balance for her laptop insurance. and yesterday was the first time i dragged myself out.

it was really a bad day. i didn't talk much cos everytime i sit and stand, i feel like vomitting. it sure wasnt a great feeling.

imagine after going to school, i still dragged myself to funan. boo. wrong decision.

we took 961 from cityhall back to woodlands. it was a very wrong idea. cos after we got on and the bus travelled to chinatown i think, there's this chap who got on. he was damn freaky lah. he was meddling with some angbaos and even undies which i reckoned they were those females wore. he was bleeding all over which kind of frightened me. the more i looked at his wounds, the more i felt like puking. me and yeelu didn't dare to speak hence we message each other. hahaha. we got down at the stop outside hwa chong institution.

while waiting for the bus right, i fell asleep. then when badbrain knocked me(wah lao, damn pain lah), the bus just went off. we made our mind to take cab home, so i stood up and walked to the roadside. and my oh my, the feeling was coming, i stationed myself on the grass patch, and *vlarp vlarp vlarp*. everything came out. my noodles weren't digested and the worst part was some of the vomit came out of my nose. it was a sickening feeling lah.

eeeeee, i'm still scared of the man. i felt so threatened, still.

happier happier things! i'm getting my lappie lap lap later later! whee. whee. whee.

oh no more heaty stuffs for me. poor thing.

i'm so awake after sleeping at 8.30pm till now. i went to see the doctor and he did it so fast. less than 5 minutes i'm out of his room. hope medicine works.

i'm gonna miss out a lot of things today. i'll miss out ah gong's(terence's) birthday bash and superband performance at suntec. sheesh. i'll be at grandma's house later. her birthday celebration.

i want to bake muffins.

le noir;
2:05 AM

Friday, March 24, 2006

finally, the function's back. whee.

that's fad, stuart and me. notice stuart's glowing?

ohohoh, as promised. not the best shot but the only shot with both of them in. whee.

the weather was threatening. but the wind was really great.

oh oh oh, orange days(above pic) is a very nice jap drama. do catch it aight. i don't mind watching it again.

and thank goodness shud's nano is not as bad as i thought it would be. to think that it's still in one piece after flying down from seventeen floors, it's really lucky.

i'm getting my lappie lap lap on saturday! woolala.

and i want to bake lots of muffins.

ah ah ah, i'm going back to my previous workplace to help out again. good. i'll have income.

i hate the pimples and their scars. totally irritating. brrrrr.

le noir;
8:09 AM

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

something's wrong with blogger's photo uploading function, right? i can't upload any pictures.

was out with fad and stuart on sunday. stuart wanted to blade and only three of us were free so yeah. we went.

i'm going to be so sick of pastamania soon. no idea why stuart loves it so so so much.

playing bishi bashi is a good way to bruise your hands. just two times and my bones are hurting.

we went to ecp! heee. i volunteered to stay behind and look after their belongings cos you know, i want to see *cough cough* mr asscrack. he was there lah. mr hotbod there too. aiyo aiyo. i was enjoying the *scenery*. hahahahahhahaha. wanted to upload another photo of them that i took on sunday but erm, i couldn't. i'll do next time.

i enjoyed their company. i mean fad and stuart and asscrack and hotbod. hahahahhahahaa. it makes sunday more meaningful.

oh oh oh. i wasn't allowed to use the com from sun night to early tue morning. cos bros were doing something with it. all the installing, uninstalling. bah.

was out with badbrain(again, i know). she had her body checkup at raffles hospital. haha the boobs screening part was so hilarious. i shall be a good good girl and not say anything in case the whole world knows about it. that will be just badbrain, me and jiayi. hahahahaha.

we spent most of the time eating, shopping, eating, walking, window-shopping, boys-hunting... :)

can't wait to get my own lappie lap lap!

le noir;
6:49 PM

Saturday, March 18, 2006

it's never a nice feeling to be forced out of bed because of school issues. never.

and yes, mum again.

she spoilt my whole morning. she asked so much. she's more worried than i am. and in the process of doing so, she barked. and still, she thinks i'm not a least bit enthusiastic about school. someone please ask her to chill.

i don't she likes the idea of me going mass com. oh, she really doesn't.

but i have got all the plans to go about the enrolment thing in my head. she just doesn't trust me. she never does. fancy her calling to her precious god-daughter(rmb vivian? the cousin i've got that she always compares me with.) when i was fuming. she never talks in that manner to me. i'm jealous, really.

she spoils my day.

i'm so afraid that it's coming back. i can't afford to go down a rollercoaster again. i don't want to lose myself again. someone pull me back.

le noir;
12:31 PM

Friday, March 17, 2006

okay kids, stop whatever u're doing now and think with me.

look back on your life. search on the portion that's labelled "friends".

right. now, look through. has it ever occured to you that not all your friends come by as you wish? you don't meet all your friends in the way you desire, do you? not everyone loves you for who you are at first sight, right?

i know first impressions count. but, i'm very sure first impressions don't really last.

no one enjoys being identified as an outcast, especially within a class. picture yourself in a classroom. u're sitting at your desk, doing your own work. and there, the rest of the class just sits behind you and gossip. people even place bets to confront you. why? cos they hate who you are. why? cos the first impressions that you've given were not impressive, at all.

fair? any sensible being will agree with me - it ain't fair. you guys didn't even give her a chance to get near you all. did you even try to know her a little bit more? maybe you did. you asked about her from some schoolmates. those schoolmates, as the name suggested, might not even know her that well and they decided to comment on her unnecessarily. fair? hell no.

it's just like why some foreigners and even locals dislike the smell of durians. yes, it may be smelly. thing is, you haven't even eaten it. how would you know it will taste good or bad?

90% of the people will agree with me that it's shallow to use first impressions to gauge a person's good or bad. 8% of them are those shallow people. the remaining 2% suffers from severe brain damage.

people may hate her. but we can't forget there are people who love her for who she is. yes, she swears. yes, she eats a lot. yes, she's mean. yes, she gives rude stares at people sometimes. yes, she laughs too loudly. yes, she's loud. yes, she may be tactless and blunt. some people just love her for all that. no one's perfect, believe me.

politics have never been fun. not to mention class politics. i don't see a need for that. i believe talking it out all at once works, maybe.

it reminds me of i how i used to tell shud that fern looks disgusting with her newly rebonded hair when i weren't that fond of fern in sec 2. now, we're best of friends. see what i mean?

perhaps, kids, you've got to learn to deal such cases in an adult's way.

oh, but wait, most kids are usually lack of that thing we call maturity. i really wish kids can grow up fast, mentally that is. it doesn't mean people who carry gucci handbags, wear designer's clothes, put on heavy makeup, and wear aldo heels are mature. oh yes they are, materialistically. but it may not be the case when we are talking about the mind.

you get me?

humans are weird beings at some times. they always look at the bad side of a person and never once care about the good. kill that human nature.

le noir;
1:34 AM

Thursday, March 16, 2006

wednesday morning i got down to band. was teaching drills. i found out that 95% of the sec ones in band didn't eat their breakfast. i was so so so going to die. cos i'm afraid that they'll fall and die in front of me. and so so so true enough, one of them actually fainted in front of me right after i told them to eat their breakfast next time.

i was traumatised.

after which, i went to east coast with badbrain, jiayi and loyi. perfect weather for suntanning. they wanted to blade actually. but no idea why, they lost the enthusiasm for blading and decided to sit on the beach and tan with me. good girls. hahahahhaa.

the sun was really scorching that it could melt a block of butter within 5 seconds. but thank goodness there's wind. i love how the breeze caresses my skin on a beach. hee.

it's even better when there are hot males surfing in front of you, minus the showing of asscrack. the guy on the left turned me on man. he has a lot of packs and his body is near to zero-fat. aye aye aye, so sexy.

the one on the right is freaky. hahahahaha. that's mr pigudong.

no. the focus is not on how painful was badbrain's nose after her failed nosejob recently. look at the left side of her purple(ewww) shades. ah, that's the focus.

badbrain and jiayi.

loyi and me. =)

i'm starting to love ecp now. never really like it cos i have blading nightmares at ecp. but i like it a lot now. anyone who's going there soon do call me along. :)

will be down at sentosa tmr. whee. i love the sun, the sand, the sea.

le noir;
9:29 AM

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

i went down for band with yeelu yesterday. imagine me waking up at 6.45am when i'm still slacking.

that's so not right.

but cos of band, i just got my ass off the bed and rush off to band. did drills with the juniors. hmmm, they picked up fast. but not the best.

did the pieces mr neo wants them to play for the competition in july. woohoo. i still love robert w. smith many many.

hee hee syf`07 choice piece already arrived. can't wait to lay my fingers on them.

le noir;
8:27 AM

Sunday, March 12, 2006

You Are Dublin Mudslide Ice Cream

You won't remember any of this in the morning

What Flavor Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream Are You?

le noir;
4:13 PM

ikea ikea i love ikea.

the trip was quite an impromptu. was randomly chatting with jiayi about tuesday's outing. and we decided to get out of house right after that.

but i don't like the crowds there. even the dining area was so so so crowded. and i really can't stand some adults.

the meatballs are damn filling. sambal fish was damn nice.

we went around doing random shopping. oh there was sales there so yeah, some of the stuffs were like dirt cheap.

i got my room some storage boxes, metal notice board, vase and some other random stuff. i wish i can get the whole of ikea home.

ya lah ya lah. FAT lah!

oh did i tell you that jiayi dresses up so so so so overly? just look lor. hahaha. maybe i dressed up too easily.

hee hee. i like that magnetic thing.

p.s. stop treating me like a kid. i'm more sensible than you think i am. SHUTUP!

le noir;
12:48 AM

Saturday, March 11, 2006

dear mummy

it's been so long since i last felt like i'm worthless to you. really. i thought i'd never have to do such a thing again, but i guess i have to.

everyday when i'm back, you yell at me. you check out on every single thing i've done. i never once talk back to you cos i always know there's really no need for that. and i have that respect for you. i still believe that i'm right.

till today, i can't stand it anymore. when u see that i'm carrying so many bags, the first thing you said was,"i'm going to confiscate your atm card soon."

i held back all my tears. i know, you are trying to tell me that i should not squander. but, i don't think i spend extravagantly today. not at all. i'm buying things that i need for my room. all these that i've bought today cost less than one shirt i buy.

but, that's not the point. my point is, why do you always have to control me? you didn't do that to both brothers. you didn't. don't tell me they are boys and i'm a girl. it just doesn't make much sense. we are all humans. there's nothing(perhaps, most of the things) that i can't do when they can. i believe in equality.

then you will bring up about all the female cousins that i have. in case you didn't notice my reluctance to go to grandma's hse in the past, i just want to tell you, i loathe them quite a bit because of you.

you always compare. be it studies, abilities to cook and whatever things that you can think of, you always compare. you never once thought how i would feel. and in case you don't know again, when i was pri 2, i locked myself in the room after i got home to cry. cos i could never felt myself in you.

perhaps, i'm just an accident baby. and there's no love within, like how i was made. i could always feel bias. i remembered once you told me you are not going to buy birthday cake for me but instead, you'll buy it for vivian(my cousin). it might have sounded like a joke to you, but it was no joke to me. never was. you never knew how hurt i was.

nothing hurt as bad as your words. each and every hurts deep in there. but you never know. you accused me so many times in the past. i remember every one of it. i spoke up but you never listened.

even if it was good results, you never even give praises generously. i always believe that you were trying to tell me that i deserve the results. but, praises are never too many. you never praise me before.

in case you don't know, i still love you and your place in my heart has never changed. but i just hope, i'm there in your heart.

mummy, am i there?

- lots of love
your daughter.

le noir;
9:04 PM

date movie is like a piece of plotless shit. really really dumb. but it was funny lah. the cat and the old woman are gross, like totally.

no idea why i felt like puking when i was watching the movie. perhaps it was the ball of chest hair stuck in mouth.

i was laughing the whole evening when i'm out with fad and stuart and ben fang and his friend. i bet i'll miss their vietnam cat fights.

oh, band. band was like... disappointing. i hope they get back on track soon. they are not bad, but lazy. people, work!

when will np send their enrolment package to me me me me me me?

le noir;
12:22 PM

Thursday, March 09, 2006

yesterday was shud's birthday. eeee. 17 is like old, really. haha anyway, happy (belated) birthday, girl!

met up with shud and yt before we go to concert at woodlands. haha yt's like damn funny lor. his laughter was like so contagious. i just can't stop myself from laughing. and thank you so much for calling me a fat girl.

oh and fern called me. :) miss you lots.

once we reached esplanade, i was first surprised by yaofeng. haha. he changed a lot. he waved to me but i was like "who was he waving to?". then he came to me and talked. haha.

then i saw taufiq. ah. i miss that guy's jokes. he got in acjc which was good. but not that's not his desired college. but anyway, just hang on there for 2 years. i'm sure you will love you friends soon. hahaha.

after which, we saw jaryl and we got in. saw fad too. the concert was good. better than the previous concert which i heard on the cd. this is much better. i personally like fantasy variations. a lot of melodies for lower winds and i love bassy sounds many many. so sexy.

doing boogey dance and conducting at the same time is just so not right.

went for dinner with nco peeps cos i was hungry. so i left shud with yt. haha. i want to meet up with everyone again soon!

oh, as expected, mum was holding a chopper, awaiting me. she knocked me down with a brick and chopped me into pieces. after which, she made some "leaping" char siew pau . and the rest of my family had that for breakfast.

eh, not that serious actually. she was just doing her usual nags. i really can't understand my mum. i mean, i'm more alert than she thinks i am. i'm more capable than she thinks i am. i'm more careful than she thinks i am. i'm more than everything she thinks i am. she thinks i'm naive, but wrong, very. mummy, have some faith in me alright.

le noir;
11:55 AM

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

i must thank all those anonymous souls for the constant reminders on how fat i am. i do appreciate it but really, i don't need to be reminded that often.

not that i don't know how fat i already am.

i do have self-consciousness. so you can all stop doing what you're doing and do something else more meaningful.

oh, maybe you call "reminding libing how fat she is" meaningful. but nah, really, i think it's not eh, no?

and boo to anonymous posts. dare to say i'm fat, but you don't dare to leave your name behind? why? i mean, i'd love to know who's so concerned about me and my lipids. me and my lipids say thanks for your concern but no thanks yeah.

***************************

so got back to band yesterday. hmmm, finally i get to play with the band. i miss playing with the band so much. it's been months since i last touched prestige.

i miss mr neo's suanings lah. he always find joy in doing that to me. and he leaves me speechless after that.

heard the orientation at IJ's really bad and sucky. like really bad. ahh, you peeps hang on there. it'll be soon over.

i'm going to be bored like mad for another month before school starts. sheesh.

le noir;
2:28 AM

Saturday, March 04, 2006

looks like i have to stop squandering. i need to get a notebook for school. and i need to change a phone. mine's going bonkers already.

i need a job lah.

i'm actually quite excited for school. can't wait for school to start actually. cos i'm really really sick of slacky life.

bah...

le noir;
9:12 PM

Friday, March 03, 2006

so basically, i was pretty busy yesterday. i went for two job interviews yesterday. one at raffles place as bank clerk, the other was surveryor at outram park.

working as a bank clerk is not that bad but somehow i don't think i'm going to get in cos i'm not familiar with some of the programmes.

people there are so businessy i think i can die there.

my 2nd breakfast.

bad brain's breakfast. it's as good as lunch lor.
she very spastic lah.

then i met up with jaryl and geraldine at suntec to pass jaryl his concert ticket. after which, i accompanied him to the bank for his interview(same as mine).

i met up with my dearest colleagues at city hall for a promised lunch and shopping spree. oh, met up with fred to pass him his ticket. he joined my colleagues and i for lunch. haha puppet.

we girls went shopping after which. yaya is the crazy mama. she spends money like it's freeflow(for her, i think it really is free flow). she bought lots of stuff. i bought a jumper at ebase and a wallet at mango. NOT ENOUGH! i need new tops and jeans.

i spent the whole day walking around town. end result? sore feet.

yaya still as hyper but jannah totally shagged. yaya's holding all her loots. i'm holding mine and jannah's. can't even fight with yaya.

yeah~ all three of us. once again at that corner hahaha. i'll definitely miss shopping with u peeps. we'll go out soon again k???

oh. and i got into mass com @ np. hahahahahaha. mass com, here i come~

le noir;
8:42 AM

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

life's been... boring. with no job, i find spending money a bit... wrong.

nonetheless, i still do impulsive shopping.

oh, yesterday fern was finally online for a longer time. chatted with her. haha. she even called me on the phone and we chatted for 36 min plus. haha. it's like past midnight there already.

and girl, must take care of yourself there. especially once ur mum's back. and get use to life there soon yeah. plus plus. make more (male) friends so you can bring some to me when you're back for holidays. hahahahahaha.

ever since erm... sec 2, i haven't been missing someone so much. i really miss a lot bimbo. hope aus telecom services get efficient and you get your line damn soon so you can get online and webcam conversation with us. bah.

i miss ncos also leh. when are we going to meet again? ac concert? ah, now everyone's so busy with school we hardly meet up. soon soon soon k?

i miss my class gang though we met just not long ago. but still, i miss you all. bah.

my life continues to circle around the "booboo" zone. get me out.

le noir;
7:46 AM